Saturday, February 5, 2011

Follow the Bouncing Ball

The man is sweet nothing-ing his hound right now while I gaze lovingly at my rebound ‘1’.

It appears that the only game I would even start to touch begins near 3:05pm. The zillion other games preceding that time all involve divination, tricks and eye of chinchilla. We’ve got some who will make 3 pointers more than who will hop on their big toe whilst reciting “The Itsy Bitsy Spider”. We’ve got some wired jaw taco eating contests, and who will win by 2+ goals while churning butter. I hate these and I’m not good at them. Hence, a good and unsportsman-like reason as to why I don’t like them.

So I took a chance because I really didn’t want to wait until 3pm to make a pick.

This is where the Grasshopper learns about patience. I chose that Xavier would win by double digits. Because 97.7% of folks also thought so. Baaaaaaaaaaaa. I copied. And this is where the Grasshopper learns that impatience is the mudslide to losing the building block of a streak.

Ok so I lost that one to a differential of 8 points…single digits. I’ve got a single digit for ya.

I’m going to check out the double Wisconsin game. Green Bay Phoenix vs the Milwaukee Panthers. Neither of them are really getting any excitement out of me but I want to belong in the world of cyber gambling! I decided eventually to go with the Milwaukee Panthers since they won their last three games, and they’re home. Actually, that’s sort of a fib. I decided to choose them when I thought they were on the road. The home thing was a plus. The and preview tab is sponsored today by Mysteries. Because they leave you wondering with no clues. We are Sans Preview report today.

****Post Game****

Hells Yay! A One!

Next I’m looking at a tough choice. Mississippi Rebels are playing @ Arkansas Razorbacks. I checked for a preview (none), the home/road stats, the stats for the season against other teams and the basic rebound/assists/field goat pct/PPG stats. The thing that finally helped me sway in one direction or another was that last choice. It appears that the Rebels have better standings. That and only 3.6% of Streakers chose them. Deal sealed. I still have 8 minutes Dougie Fresh, to change my mind. Mah mah Mind, mind.

****Post Game****

A number of beers later I am grateful that I am 100 lbs with good cholesterol. And happy to say that I’ve gotten myself into that elite club known as 3.8%. I chose Mississippi and there it is…they won. I learned how to spell Mississippi as a child through one of those Bouncing Ball cartoons that were on after school. I’ve tried googling it for this post but like a win for me in the soccer games…it is elusive.

So for the next game I noticed the Chicago Bulls are playing at the Golden State Warriors. This one is pretty excorcist ugly to me because 1% only, chose GSW. Do you realize how tempting it is to be a part of that 1%? I loves me a minority! But after looking, I decide to go with the Bulls. I know everyone’s got something to lose, but the Bulls have a winning streak of 6. I figure they want to protect that. So with that incredibly Un-Savvy methodology, I’m off to hopefully win a game, finish this Erdinger and coax a honey into exposing his best birthday suit.

Pee Wee Streakman


Streak Start: Deux! Or should I say, Dos?


I am now inspired after hearing Crazy Train by Metalachi to check out their version of Master of Puppets by Metallica. Who’da thought?


Texas done good by me and I‘preciate it.


I will not waste this gracious positive number two (and really, who doesn’t appreciate a good number two?) on a soccer game that I hardly know.


Instead I’ll let it throw itself at another hockey game. I had to wait all the way until 7:35pm to have a game in progress! But this is good, keeps me out of trouble whilst I tend to my dayjob.
Now I am usually good at choosing the hockey games. Usually means most of the time. Tonight is that other indefinable piece of time that isn’t under the ‘most’ umbrella. I chose the Tampa Bay Lightening to win at home….lounging in their backyards, tin foil under their chin for tans….iced drinks. Ah, but not to be. The Washington Capitals came through and even right now as I am typing, are shaming the Lightning out of holding their own hockey sticks. Every time I click onto the webpage to check on how many threads are still possibly holding on to my streak, I see that the Capitals have basically hired Godzilla to kick the Lightning off the entire rink and are just making shots whenever they feel like it.


So within no time, ESPN has the red banner up there all glaring and angry with me. If I had won they woudn’t have updated my color status that quickly!!!


Now it’s time for the random pick since my streak did just that out the door. At least I feel important today because my daughter asked my opinion on baby bathtubs…..hammock included.


So out of laziness and the impatience of tequila, I choose the last game on the board for tonight. Will Denver win against Utah Jazz by double digits? Or will they either win by single digits or lose altogether? The majority took Single Digit so Tequila says Go for It. Click.

Friday, February 4, 2011

Texas? Mariachi metal?

Streak is starting off rotund and happy. Zay-Ro.

Tried to focus while I heard a mariachi band cover Crazy Train with horns and kept one ear out for bells being played since that’s what the youngin’ is supposed to be doing.

The preview tells me that Dallas has been playing hide and keep hiding with a win lately. It also tells me that this dude Tim Thomas is pretty dominant in his play. I do see that the stats for home and road aren’t anything that stand out to me but since I used to own one of these Boston Bruins long sleeved shirts where the color was faded, I choose the Bruins. I didn’t actually buy the shirt…it was my boyfriend’s when I was 22 and so, I ganked it from him and hung on to it for quite some time until some other boyfriend ganked it from me. Such is the circle of recycling.

****Post Game****

The Bruins came through. I will admit my mind got a bit overly happy when I saw that the Bruins already had a 4 point lead early on. When I checked back later, Dallas had brought their score up by 3 points. Ooops. Not so confident NOW, are we Granny???

All in all, I won this one. Yeah!

So next I feel déjà-vu. The Spurs and Lakers. Again. Didn’t I just deal with this game recently? It just feels that way.

They both look great but I am going against my Texas rule just for this one. You see how it is, Guys? Women can’t be trusted to do anything except be subject to changing their minds from moment to moment.

Ok Texas, don’t fail my whimsical ways!

Please enjoy the Metalachi!

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Groundhogs and Bulls and Clippers..Oh My!


Streak Start: Barbed wire Zero.

And I’m glad that I didn’t choose that groundhog option for extra special weight to lower my IQ further. Mate says it was so easy it is ridiculous since he figured there is no sun out for Mr. Hog to see his shadow.

This is where the female mind gets itself into trouble. I figured….with all this crazy weather, there has to be more winter. And then…shadow? It’ll be on stage and there may be lights so there could be a shadow, sans ball of fire in the sky. If this was 1819, I would have gotten it right without all these crazy loophole ways of thinking!

What I saw was two men passing the stunned groundhog back and forth in a well dressed and slow game of hot potato. Anyhoo, Badgers 1, Groundhog, 0.

So why am I gravitating toward a soccer game? Because I’m stubborn. Because I love bad relationships. Soccer don’t do right by me 50% of the time. Soccer doesn’t understand what I need, (a win) and therefore, the female rescue agent in me will continue to court it even when I say that I won’t.

I chose the Le Mans/AS Nancy Lorraine game. Le win? Mais Non! Nancy Lorraine was home putting on her makeup and drew the game simply because I chose the Win option. Thanks to hell Nanc. Thanks.

The Mate and I both wanted to dip our toes into the Baylor Bears @ Oklahoma Sooners game. We both desperately wanted to take the Bears. Which I started to. But there was something in those stats that made me switch to Oklahoma. I’m guessing that I started looking at who plays better home vs who pulls out the blue cheese on the road. Comparatively speaking of course. At the start of the game I was fairly sure that I was going to lose. Partly because when Mate, the Almighty Vat of Knowledge when it comes to sports, heard that I took the Sooners, he gave one of those subtle changes of energy that tell me it isn’t a pick he would have made. I made mention that I did end up going with a very small percentage of folks…6.4% to be exact, and he brushed me off as trying to be in the minority for the sake of the theoretical flip off. Now, I will say that yes, I do enjoy being in the minority. But only if I believe I can win. I will not choose a team that I don’t think will win just for the sake of being different. Unless it’s Texas in most forms. I mentioned that I chose them because I believed they could win. And with that, Mate gave one of those smiles that say, sure, whatever, and slinked out the door to shovel.
It’s wasn’t really such a horrible moment to let him know that the Sooners won. Later!

More basketball. Virginia Tech Hokies @ NC State Wolfpack. I did choose the Wolfpack, who were home. But there was something about it that didn’t stick. I really need to document these things in the moment because Hotpants Granny can’t seem to let these things stick in her mind. Again, something about who does what where and who has what to lose. I switched to Virigina Tech and thankfully, they came through.

The time came to choose the late night game and I have a snuggly 2 to work with. It looked simple to go ahead and choose the Vancouver Canucks @ Phoenix Coyotes but after watching High School Musical 2 for the 3rd time today, I arrived at the mouse a moment too late to pick. I would have chosen the Canucks. Time forced me to forge ahead.

Chicago Bulls are scuffing floors at the Los Angeles Clippers. The Bulls seem to have a much better run this season in general. Again, I chose and then swapped. I took the Bulls. Then I read the preview. I read it twice and apparently didn’t really read it the first time. What I read lead to my choice in team. I took the Clippers. And then proceeded to lose. So while I cashed in my well earned minority pick for another zero. I'll have this one dipped in coffee tomorrow morning while I figure out my next pick.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Strrrrrrrr-EEEK Two!


The Gee to the ILF took off the rest of January to beat on my other half for a bit. We chose right, we chose very wrong and we had quite the chaotic month. Must be all part of the unusual amount of snow we are getting this winter!


I will admit that I started the streak today only after watching Mate artfully go through his analyzing process. He chose a soccer game, Strasbourg to win or draw over Angers, who was home. And I copied. Then I changed to the other team after doing my own research. Then I figured, NAH!!!!! He has a better soccer average than I do so I switched back. And lost.
I have an empty nest for the first day of February! No cute little peeping numbers to show me that I’m on my way to the win!


I decided to go with the Purdue Boilermakers/Wisconsin Badgers game. At first glance, I wanted to choose the Boilermakers. Because I have no idea what that is. I know that if they have anything to do with boiling water for my morning coffee, they can have my vote every game! Looking closely though, I was swayed by reading the preview of the game. This is the new, Studious Spor-Tay Granmamma. From what I could see, the Badgers so far have not lost a game at home. Neither has Purdue. But the game is at Wisconsin. Lick the envelope, the deal is sealed. I made my choice and I’m sticking to it. Wisconsin, deliver me to my first flame to show light at the end of this month’s tunnel! Will the badger see his shadow??? Or will my streak see the shadow of a trumpet coming out to play Taps?


****Post Game****


Now seeing as Mate did not touch that game, I was pretty unsettled about it. He figured it was too close a call to ante his “1” on. But YAY! I won that one and took a mouse stroll through the roster to see what’s up next. The Vanderbilt Commodores are playing @ Florida Gators. Hmmm. Hmmmmm. Hmmm some more and then chalk this one up to Nope, this one is dead. I get no feelings from it. However, the San Antonio Spurs are playing the Portland Trail Blazers. I did run alongside and jump up on the Spur Train. The whole 40-7 vs. Portland’s 25-22 thing was rather intimidating. I know Portland can totally do a David and Goliath but I’m gonna go with what seems to make sense for tonight. Here’s hoping to wake up with a purring and cuddly ‘2’ to start this month right!

Sunday, January 9, 2011

I've Been Vandalized


Streak Start: This “1” really brings out the blue in my eyes.


So I’ve ignored Streak for a day….thinking it might miss me a little if I played hard to get. Perhaps it would accidentally bump me to a 10 even though I haven’t played. But apparently the Streak has enough Fawning Admirers and although I have my special place in its moody heart, I can’t be the center of its universe at this point. I mean, how can I when we get stuck on first dates?


I choose with careful confidence where our next date will take place. I know I’ve got my No Rooting for Texas rule. However, TWO Texas teams were going to share the nets today…Baylor Bears at Texas Tech Red Raiders. I don’t remember why I ended up choosing to court Baylor, but they won. My validation for choosing Texas? Texas vs. Texas means Texas will also lose.
It worked for now….I’m nervously hanging out with a 2. Two is hanging out? What? Is that legal?


A tough call looking at the Miami Hurricanes who are going to cross the Clemson Tigers threshold. In these cases, it seems to make sense to choose the home team. This could very well come back to bite me and swallow my 2 (hmmm….might not be such a bad thing). We shall see. I do like Tigers though. But I’ve met more Hurricanes.


****Post Game****


I’d be super witty right now but I have a girl child burping in my ear and a conversation to boot. Sometimes she’s talented enough to hold an entire conversation with a single belch.
The Tigers came through for me. Ga-Rowl. I’ve got another game to pick for the night to see if I can change that soft, supple “3” into an angular, manly “4”.


On that baritone of a note, I’m looking at yet another NCB game….the Idaho Vandals (Idaho always reminds me of a dirty joke from when I was in middle school) at the San Jose State Spartans. I like Will Ferrell. He was a Spartan cheerleader.


****Post Game****


I might add that Will Ferrell was not a REAL cheerleader.


Sis Boom Bah!
Gave Me A Zero, Didn’t CHA?

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Cookies and Kisses


Streak Start: 1


Yeah! I’m pole dancing around my “1”! But then again, is this simply going to be another first date only?


The Mister is not in a very popular mood tonight. Extra coffee and cookies will probably sway the boat. I hear they are very good for recovering from hernia repair surgery.


I had all kinds of Grown Up duties to tend to today and therefore never did get to put the proper amount of research into my winning 50K for this month. GOOD LORD that’s a great truffle!!! I’m hanging out doing that whole cyber serious thing, moving haybales and trees around on my Farmville and eating truffles.


So the only pick I’ve made today has come after watching the dog poop three times today, locking the chickens back up for the night and wondering why it seems like the Olive Garden dumped off all their dishes in my sink after the dinner rush.


Basically I’m wearing a t-shirt that says, All I Got to Pick Was a Lousy Hockey Game. After swapping back and forth I decided on taking the Phoenix Coyotes at home vs the Columbus Blue Jackets. The brewing Grandbaby lives in Arizona….so in hindsight that’s why I really chose them. Otherwise it was file under Girl Reasons – what’s cuter, a blue jacket or a coyote? More dangerous? Edgy?


Hoping tonight is the night that I dream of Ark de Noah and how his journey was brought to you by the number 2.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Hey 3! You Look Mighty Cute in Them Jeans!




Streak Start: Pbbbbbbttttttt!



Will the redemption never arrive?



I’m terrific at luring and baiting a one here and there, but apparently in the last couple of weeks, I’m not passing muster for a 2nd date.



At the moment I see there are a plethora of 1pm games going on today. As of this writing, it’s only 11:33am. I’m going to enjoy some coffee, Farmville and oatmeal. Cozy grandma type things. Soon I’m going to learn how to knit skeleton sweaters for the Hot Topic baby. I also have the dog barking at what might be the flapping of a fly’s wings and Mate talking on the phone next to me. I can barely write a coherent sentence so pick-choosing is probably on the off peak at the moment.



****Post Distraction****



Well, had I simply seen New England Patriots at home vs the Miami Dolphins, I wouldn’t even need a brain to chose. So hopefully this isn’t one of those, YEAH, CHECK OUT THIS NO BRAINER…EVEN MY GUINEA PIGS WOULDN’T GET THIS ONE WRONG and then Oops. New England gets a wedgie. In between making more coffee, feeding humans and having a head full of blog posts (my Other Blogs are out there…check under profile), I’m looking for a quick pick, a chance to see Mate naked in the shower and some reading time.



****Post Game and Shower****



Can I tell you how relieved I am that not only do I have at least one erect thing in my life (a shiny new “1”!) since Mate’s hernia surgery a few days ago? Besides the Patriots winning me the stuffed bear at the carnival, the Ravens have also won. I have no pick riding on their wings, but do like the team.



Next up for the 4:15 games was a pile of confusion and new GPS programming. I was going to take Eagles over Dallas until I saw that none of Philly’s players were showing up. Slight exaggeration but I’m a girl who is dog paddling in the sports pool so that’s what you get. I really wanted to go against Dallas (see prior Never Picking Texas Teams Rule) but didn’t feel like Philly was 100% going to catch me. I’m pretty sure it’s possible that they’d have my ass before my back so moving along.



I recall losing the one time I did decide with full throttle abandon to rip it all off and choose the Houston Texans. And then I lost my streak. So I was left flapping in the breeze after finally giving in. So today’s rule of No Texas is up, reinforced with brick walls and high school security guards with 3 moustache hairs each.



I checked out the San Diego Chargers @ Denver Broncos instead. Hm. You know, I thought I wouldn’t find anything on this menu that was going to graze my palate as nicely as choosing (safely) against any Texas team. This one seems to be it. Don’t worry, I have my plate of Crow waiting in the fridge should I need it. Mate currently has a 4 streak so maybe he can feed it to me. Naked.



****Post Game****



It’s been a few glasses of wine at this point and after San Diego won, I decided to go with a fun basketball game. I imagined choosing Seattle Seahawks at first up against St. Louis, but didn’t. Why? Well the conversation with Mate went in the direction of me wanting to take Seattle but thinking maybe I oughta choose St. Louis. I’d want to visit Seattle more than St. Louis and Mate agreed with that. However, that’s the Girl way of choosing things and it may or may not increase my streak. I decided to ignore that game and choose Stanford Cardinal basketball instead. They’d be entertaining the California Golden Bears for the evening. It was one of those picks where neither looked especially threatening to the other so I went with the home team.
And it paid off. I am embracing a “3” in bed tonight peeps. Oh the glory of a 3 in patchouli as opposed to a Zero in Brut. Mere child’s play!



Sweet dreams tonight. I’ll be engulfed by my 3 while it lasts.