Thursday, December 23, 2010

That's right. I need some PJ!

My day starts with a lovely and seasonal shade of a Winning Green “1”!

Yeah yeah…ok…kudos to the mate who allowed me to copy off of his term paper last night.

Being new to G-ma land, I survey my new perks. Pajama jeans. Mate pointed them out on the TV to me as an item that I should be interested in. I might be needing them because even though I am about 100 lbs, on the inside I will need the big, jolly grandparent waistband that they provide. More like waist ban! Ew!

Chic? Stylish? If you’re not completely delighted send it back? All of these words are uttered in the sweet nothings of this infomercial. Can you use the word ‘Delighted’ with pajama jeans?

I am forced to stand outside in the light snow and take the google bus to Kerkyra for any sort of stats that are not listed in shapes. Boy those Greek sites really confound me! It doesn’t take much as it is but boy, this is double dipped confoundment! Finding some sort of schedule in a G-ma friendly layout takes a couple of stops on Link Road but I finally find something. A brief trip to both schedules to score compare and I get a case of the F*ck its. I’ll choose Kerkyra for the win or draw. Naturally though, whatever I am prone to choosing in a soccer game usually means I should chose the opposite. Game starts in 20 minutes and I have work to do and although I rather enjoy any sort of streak that isn’t in the negatives, I’ll put my 2 on it.

I’m going to put on NPR online and be old now.

Random note: my butt fell asleep. I’d better check on the soccer game.

It’s half time. And both teams are currently having a hot Zero Casserole. I’m ok with that. I like to draw in Soccer Standard Time. Just have to get through the last moments of the game with this draw. Soccer is crazy like that. They’ll go for 87 minutes without one goal and then suddenly at the end the tricks come out. Someone sets off dry ice and the other team can’t see so Team Dry Ice plunges in 3 goals. Or a cat is catapulted onto the field and lands in one of the goalie’s shorts and thus, 20.2 goals by the opposing team. I refuse to be fooled into a comfort zone by this current supposed draw.

We are at the 90 minute mark …. The computer housing my potential streak builder or dive went to sleep so I can’t see the score just by looking…I have to wake it up. A moment later, the truth is revealed. The cat was thrown into the pants of the Iraklis goalie. In the last 10 minutes, Kerkyra has scored a goal. Gee, what a shocker. I’m definitely not going to torture myself by watching the play by play on the internet – that’ll just cause blood pressure issues.

Going in past the 90 minute mark, an elephant with a spiked collar has run rampant toward Kerkyra and Iraklis has scored. So far so good…it’s still a draw.

You can’t trust the last moments of a soccer game. You just can’t. Sheeeee-it. I’m going downstairs to make coffee so as to avoid the emotional rollercoaster of the last minute.
I went downstairs to make coffee, put on a pot of dried beans to cook for a couple of hours, did a few dishes, some squats and checked my Facebook profile. Avoidance issues much?

Thankfully, the curtain closed on that game when it did.

Next game up of my choosing is the Washington State Cougars vs the Baylor Bears in college basketball. The in between picks were again, those that you’d have to eat sports for a living to figure out. Or at least that’s my perception. I don’t feel like taking a learning curve right now for that and have already sanded down my pride in asking mate for his pick last night. In checking the only preview read that I could find quickly, I went with the Cougars. Why? Because they have the nickname Wazzu! Rhymes with the Great Gazoo from the Flintstones. But also because the opinion that I read seems to think so and listed a few points. So ok, I won’t copy mate but I’ll let this guy sway my vote, right? As the article states, Bring on The Bears! Apparently only 5.6% of us currently think so an hour before gametime!

****Post Game****

I’m a Proud member of the 5.6% Club. Thanks for the ‘3’ guys! I’ll be sure to use it up as fast and furious as I can! I placed the last check of the night with Florida State vs the Butler Bulldogs. The Dingo is eating my baby because I am 3 points behind so far. This surely spells out that I am back in the cage with the wire monkey. Clinging with wont to that Bastard Zero that keeps slipping in with me late at night. I might as well just munch my way through this whole bag of Trader Joe’s reduced guilt French Onion multigrain chips now.

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